Sunday, June 25, 2006

absens haeres non erit

i use outlook express to organize my acting jobs. there's a folder called "auditions/jobs" and it contains 325 messages since the beginning of 2005. june's been a pokey month. only 3 auditions. one, a remake of a japanese movie was cancelled, another i bowed out of politely because i couldn't find a role, and the last one i had to drive nine hours to shreveport, la.
it's a reliable snapshot of how much PS2/PBR time i log in any period.
since i've come to know jesus christ so well, my bank account was blessed this month with an abundance of residuals ("pay matt what belongs to matt" - thanks, jc): a lottery spot from over a year ago, a made for tv movie from new orleans before the flood (thanks for nothing, god), and a teen drama appearance from a few years back.
now, that last one, the tv show dawson's creek, netted after taxes about five dollars. so i turned once again to jesus christ to find out where tha fuck my money at.
jesus shucked and jived, mostly about how the kingdom of heaven isn't full of rich playboys. i know for a fact heaven's roads are paved with gold teeth and every soul shits chunky monkey. i believe he put it this way:
it's a WB series, man, now enjoying syndication on the cheapest broadcaster of all, the superstation. get over yourself.
fair enough. katie holmes probably got a stack of five dollar checks on her gold teeth-plated dresser.

6 Comments:

Blogger onthetowns said...

What interest does a laundry clerk have in Abbey, indeed!

So was the Japanese remake cancelled, or your audition? 'Cause I think Bart thinks he has a call-back for that this week. It would suck if it's gone, since that's one of HIS only auditions this month too - and no $5 checks are rollin' in.

6/26/2006 10:17 AM  
Blogger ablebody said...

oh no, i'm sure the movie is on. they know my motto on the set is "CRY HAVOC!" and didn't invite me to their cellu-bration.
the bartist shall overcome!

6/26/2006 10:28 AM  
Blogger onthetowns said...

Yes... I think his initial audition consisted of "Give me a scared face." Really.

6/26/2006 12:58 PM  
Blogger Jed said...

step on spiiiiiiiiiiidahhhhhhhh!!!!

6/26/2006 1:27 PM  
Anonymous Henry said...

You only get 5 bucks cause you got to pay the MAN!

Who do you think paved those roads for you to drive on to get to those crappy auditions? - not Jesus (well maybe his cousin Carlos)

6/30/2006 11:07 AM  
Blogger ablebody said...

eisenhower's big idea. guess i should be more appreciative of our military junta.

6/30/2006 11:44 AM  

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